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When I was 18, in this photo above, I used to talk a lot about politics and I always thought I was right. The problem was that I didn’t know very much as I had dropped out of sixth-form, or high school, and a lot of what I did know came from punk rock records. Cops were bastards (ACAB). Meat eating was barbaric (I was vegan). We must defend ourselves against the fascist threat (scrap with a gang of skinheads).
Always being right, in my own head, gave life clarity. I was righteous against the forces of evil, I thought. Everything could fit into my weird world view, on my terms.
Thankfully, I don’t think that way anymore. Three decades later, I have gone to 45 countries and interviewed thousands of people from presidents to undercover police and from mass murderers to crying mothers. Here I am below at the spot in Tamaulipas, Mexico, where the Zetas cartel slaughtered 72 migrants.
I found out the world is tragic and beautiful and bloody complicated. People are generally well intentioned inside but do horrific things. There are not simple solutions but tradeoffs. Several things that are in conflict can be true at the same time. The line between good and evil runs through every human heart.
Unfortunately, there are people with a lot of influence who still think in simplistic terms not far from how I thought at 18. They still see the world as being in clear camps and pretend there are easy answers. They get upset when their views are challenged. It sells. Many readers and viewers want their opinions confirmed and follow faces with seeming moral clarity, even when they are lying.
Not here on CrashOut. I aim to write complex and nuanced stories about gangsters and riots and presidents and drugs and hope. And I want to seek truth, even if it upsets people or jogs my own world view.
I know a lot of you subscribers here in the CrashOut community feel the same way. Within the comments I get a wonderfully rich cross section of opinion and experience and knowledge. I learn a lot from you. And I am happy to keep on this journey wherever it takes us all.
So for the 90 percent of free subscribers who just read the freebie section, why not take the plunge and join us too. Whatever your political views are or are not, whatever your life story, your voice is most welcome in the mix. And if you want real journalism to cut through the noise then bung it a penny. For the price of a cuppa coffee, make a couple of clicks and BOOM, welcome on board.
I know some of you may agree with many stories and then disagree with one suddenly. That is great. These are complex issues. I even disagree with myself some of the time. I hope you keep with it and I look forward to having my analysis challenged.
For those who haven’t been on the case, among the biggest CrashOut stories from the last quarter, we have:
A video conversation on the Jalisco death camp, here.
A photo essay on crystal meth and Skid Row here.
A history of cartel propaganda videos here.
A breakdown on the Chapitos-Jalisco Cartel alliance here.
A look at Singapore and its death penalty here.
The latest story on the L.A. protests and riots here.
Subscriber Work
There has been some banging work coming from CrashOut subscribers in other places. This quarter I give a special shout to:
Scottish novelist Johnny Proctor and his books that take you on a journey from DJ’ing to Mexican drug deals to madness and back. Check out more here at Paninaro Publishing.
Jack Beavers writes the Substack “U.S. Border News,” which you can check out here. It “follows hundreds of official sources & high-quality unofficial open-source intel sources on both sides of the US-Mexico border to identify news & trends before they are reported by the mainstream media.” As Jack’s bio says he is “an Emmy-awarded US journalist who was raised near the Texas border with Mexico. He has lived the issues he now reports on (well before Richard Nixon declared a “War on Drugs” in 1968).”
We even have a Japanese connection. Yusuke does a great YouTube channel on Yakuza, cartels, gangs and crime. You can check it out here. It’s in Japanese, but damn don’t you speak it! Or perhaps you can get some subtitles.
My own book Blood Gun Money also came out this month in an updated edition in Spanish as Sangre, Armas y Dinero. Editorial Trillas did a bang-up job so it’s well worth getting in shops in Mexico or you can order from Amazon here, or get it on Kindle here.
Summer officially starts on midsummer solstice on June 21 but damn I think of it as June 1 so it’s already begun for me. There have already been significant riots in Los Angeles, in reaction to ICE raids, in Northern Ireland, after the arrest of immigrants for alleged sexual assault, and in Paris, over its own team PSG winning the Champions League (I thought you celebrated wins and rioted with losses!). I hope this isn’t just the beginning of a long hot summer of riots, but let’s see. It feels a bit tense in the air. Either way, enjoy those sunny days if you have them wherever you are.
As a final shout, this video goes to Jonathan Ramos, CrashOut’s top commentator in sheer number. He says he is a big fan of Zombie by The Cranberries, so when I saw this singer in Singapore crooning it, I thought, BOOM.
Second photo by Juan Alberto Cedillo.
Copyright Ioan Grillo and CrashOut Media 2025
The Zeta Bus Massacre. San Fernando, where you are pictured, is one of most beautiful cities in Tamalipaus. The square is old school Mexico. The violence in that area greatly changed what was, in my view, a very nice place.
This is the best Substack to subscribe to and I have a few. Truly, a menace to vested interests. Your punk picture is great although if you saw me then there probably would have been a clash. I had long curly blond hair that was practically an afro. I looked like the white version of Hendrix, closer looking to Noel Redding though. Talk about getting older, now I look like Santa Claus with all white hair and white beard. I was over thirty going to to punk clubs in the 80's and there was always the clash between mohawks and long hairs. The worst punks were the young, little rich wieners. Music always sounded better in the back or balcony anyways.
You do have and will have a lot to write about. The attempted assassination of Uribe in Colombia is a simmering story ready to breakout in flames. Very little written of substance about the attempt even in Colombia. Take care and summer is almost here. After a spring of 35-50 degrees F., we have warmed up and now 6 days of rain. Soon, time to retreat to the forest. Hopefully the Canadians will put out a fire!!